Know thyself  in 25 questions

1. What does your ideal day look like? It wouldn't be too full or busy. But it would be full of the people I love most and who make me smile and laugh the most. Like when you're laughing really hard and realise how great being in their company makes you feel. I'd want to spend it with those people. It would involve some simple but good food. And sunshine. Warm sunshine. Other than that, what we're doing would be irrelevant to a huge extent. 

2. What did you want to be when you were younger? – an artist at one stage. An accountant at another. And a lawyer for a while. I've still not figured out what the answer is. 

3. Who are you most inspired by? Why? I don't really know the answer, and yet I feel it should be quite straight forward. Different people inspire me in different ways. My dad inspires me to be generous with my time and money. My mum inspires me to be caring and kind and to look out for people even if others aren't. Matt inspires me to be confident and to be passionate and loyal and committed in everything I do in life. I have friends who inspire me to be braver, to be myself, to be more thoughtful, and so many more things. I'm inspired and spurred on by them all in different ways.

4. Who would you love to meet? What would you ask? – I'd love to meet David Tennant, just because of my teenage (who am I kidding, permanent) crush and love for him. I don't think I'd be able to ask for more than a selfie though. On a more intellectual level maybe, I'd like to have met Jesus. Ask him what the deal is with everything. 

5. What habit would you most like to break? What habit would you most like to start? – I'd like to break the habit of procrastinating so much, and being quite lazy at times. It's not an attractive, or useful, habit by any means. I'd like to learn to cook frequently, more or less from scratch, and enjoy it. 

6. Think of a person you truly admire. What qualities do you like about that person? – The qualities I admire are the same as the ones I said inspire me a couple of questions previously. I admire honesty, sincerity, authenticity, loyalty, and true friendship. There are a few people who jump out that I admire and they harbour at least some of these qualities. Those, and other adjectives like hard-working and committed.

7. How do you like to relax? - Sometimes on my own: I'm an introvert at heart at I often recharge best by spending time in my own company. Whether that's doing something productive or hibernating in front of the TV. Otherwise, I like going for walks. I love shopping and am far too good at spending money. I like eating. And I like doing these things with people I'm comfortable with.

8. When was the last time you did something you were afraid of? - umm…I've had to make a lot of phone calls recently – which sounds pathetic but to an awkward introvert like me, that is seriously scary stuff. I've had to put myself out there a few times recently and take part in social situations that feel really far out of my comfort zone too. They're all I can think of just now.

9. What are you most proud of? – right now, getting a 2:1 honours degree in Psychology. When I took voluntary suspension of my course at Strathclyde, I was concerned I wouldn't get anywhere. That I was stuck. And I'm so happy to have proved myself wrong. From the thousands that applied, to the 600 students on my course in 1st year, to scraping into 3rd year honours despite narrowly missing out on the required grade. And along the way there were many moments I thought I couldn't do it. Many meltdowns and panics. But I made it. I am a graduate. I have an upper second class MA(social science) honours degree in Psychology. Yasss.

10. What are you most afraid of? – the weird answer is vomit. *shudders* I have a fully fledged phobia of sick. Of others being sick, of me being sick, of anything to do with it. I don't know where it originated from, but it's been there for as long as I can remember. For that reason I get super nervous on long coach trips, aeroplanes, rollercoasters, pubs and clubs with drunk people, watching casualty….anywhere people are likely to throw up gives me a annoying amount of associated anxiety! 

11. If life stopped today, what would you regret not doing? – Not being brave or confident enough to do things (letting fear get in the way.) Not keeping in touch with people from school. Not making friends at uni. Not taking up/keeping up hobbies. 

12. Who would you like to connect (or reconnect) with? Why?similar to the last question, I wish I'd made more of an effort to keep in touch with some people from school. Looking at the wedding invite list (which don't get me wrong, has the people most important to me in the world on it, plus many more fab friends and family) makes me disappointed that I didn't keep in touch with anyone. There are about half a dozen friends I wish I'd made more of an effort to stay friends with. The reasonfor this is that they knew me from when I was about 5 – I have no friends left in my life, other than on Facebook, who can backdate me beyond around the age of 12, which just seems a little sad. 

13. What qualities do you admire in others? - Kindness. Authenticity. Honesty. Sincerity. Loyalty.

14. What practical skills do you wish you had? – musical ones. I wish I could play the piano. I wish I could become at least average at playing a brass instrument (preferably without having to practice haha!). And actually more generally, the practical skill I wish I had is being able to make conversation😳😂

15. Imagine you're in your 90s. What memories would you like to have. What stories would you like to tell? my instant response here is a bit sad and bittersweet, in that I would just want to have my memories, and be able to remember my stories. Alzheimer's and Dementia are a sad reality, so my real hope would be to just remember the life I've had, what I've spent it doing and who I've spent it with.

16. What is your favourite book/movie/song? Why? I always struggle with questions like this. Maybe cos I'm so bad at making decisions.

Book = recently, my fav has been 'Small Great Things' by Jodi Picoult. But I have no idea what my all time favourite is. I really liked the book 'Rebecca' when I was in high school. My fav childhood books were 'The tiger who came to tea' and 'peace at last'. But I don't have an all time fav. Maybe I've still to come across it.

Movie = same situation… I can't decide on just one. And actually, my favs are really all a strange mix of childhood favourites – Matilda, Home Alone, Legally Blonde, Mrs Doubtfire. Things I could recite the lines to and that make me smile.

Song = I don't think I can pick just one for this either. I love the song 'He will not let go' by Laura Story. How to Save a Life by the Fray is up there (partly because of Grey's), Read all about it from Emeli Sande, For good from Wicked, a few Coldplay songs, Keep Breathing from Ingrid Michaelson, and lots of Laura Story's songsactually. And SO many more.

17. If you could make one change in the world what would it be? – I would want people to be kinder. To see the similarities between us, not the differences, and live a lot more harmoniously than the world does at the minute. Seems like an idealistic fairytale these days for sure.

18. What do you love to do for, or give to others (not an object – something from you personally) I love to listen. I love being able to just listen to people when they need someone to talk to or offload to. I don't often (or usually) have the answers or solutions, but I love being able to just give my time and be there for them by listening. 

19. What excites you? – The future. The next few weeks and months. Marrying Matt, moving into our beautiful new house and starting married life together. On a smaller scale – food and sunshine excite me a lot. Grey's Anatomy quite often does too. And more often than not, silly things that would generally excite a 5 year old like rubber ducks or pool lilos or turtles.

20. What do you wish you did more of? this sounds like a generic answer, but I wish I could spend more time with some of my friends. The ones who make my heart happy (again with the cheesiness), and make me laugh really hard, and make me feel the most like myself. People are so busy and have families and jobs and churches and lives of their own, and it can be so so hard to arrange time to spend together. It makes me sad! So more of that for sure. 

21. Pretend money is no object – what would you do? selfish answer is that I would go on a very long holiday in order to travel and explore. I'm not really a hostel or overnight train kind of person, so if money wasn't an object, I'd definitely do as much travelling as possible. 

22. What area of your life, right now, makes you feel the best? Which area makes you feel the worst? Why? - Best = Matt/Wedding/future, for obvious reasons. Worst= post-uni plan, cos I don't really have one. Although actually that's not stressing me too much right now, so maybe church and god stuff?

23. Lets jump forward a year. What would you like to have achieved in the past year? I would like to have a job, or be doing more studying. And be happily married and settled in my house with Matt. Oh and also to be actively involved with the Youth at Clydebank in some aspect. And to have found some stability and excitement in my own faith.

24. What piece of advice would you give to 5 year old you? 16 year old you? 21 year old you?

5y/o me = take up some hobbies, practice hard and stick to them.

16y/o me = stop trying so hard to be who you think other people need you to be, stop trying to change to fit in. Stop following the crowd.

21 y/o me = be braver, be more confident. You can do it. 

25. How do you want to be remembered in life? for being authentic, and honest, and loyal, and kind. I'm not quite there yet on some of them, but they are values which are important to me, so I'd like to hope they are traits that I do or at least will eventually exude.


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